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Old Tennis Shoes

"Funny that a pair of really nice shoes make us feel good in our heads--at the extreme opposite end of our bodies." - Levende Waters

During moments of spiritual uncertainty I sometimes chafe inwardly with regard to the big questions. You know, what will be my legacy? How will I carve out a lasting existence that transcends this little blink of mortality? Neither art nor literature could assuage my angst.

Reluctantly, I excluded even my own male progeny, Dylan, from this equation for I cannot claim full authorship of his creation. I needed something more personal, more visceral to signal my contribution to our collective humanity. Recently my muse stumbled across a powerful answer in an unexpected source.

After several failed attempts to expunge the offending odor from my sneakers I am now convinced that my enduring personal legacy will be biological in nature. Unleashing a series of treatments with merciless germicidal deodorants, I expected my footwear to radiate the crisp, sanitary aroma of a dentist’s office. However, the end result marries the subtle floral high notes of a Febreeze with the spicy, muscular funk of an ape’s armpit. I suppose a profound message lies hidden in today’s subtext.

If you think my writing stinks, wait till ya get a whiff o’ my sneakers!

Shoes: 1

Jay:     0

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